Jan 29, 2014

PHOTOS: Peggy's Cove

My mom's childhood friend and her friend's daughter came to visit us for a few days the other week. They drove up from Montreal, and we had a blast. One afternoon we went to Peggy's Cove, which is pretty much THE place around here. It's dismal and cold and has a lighthouse. Oh, and the ocean.

 p.s. the absolutely fabulous Abby gave my blog a makeover! Whatcha think?

Jan 22, 2014

THOUGHTS: plans.

So I know I'm super late for the "New Years Resolutions" thing, so let's just call them plans. Or goals. Whatever.

Basically, I think I need to have some sort of idea of what I want to get done this year, even if there is a pretty good chance I won't get them done. But it's nice to think I'm working towards something! Anyway. Here's a short list.

  • Find my place.
I know that's super vague and everything, but I don't really have a more detailed plan at present. All I know is, I need to figure out...myself. What I'm supposed to be doing here. By here, I mean Nova Scotia, but also this general point in my life. 

  • Grow in my faith.
Last year and the year before that, I wasn't really making much of an effort in my faith life. That needs to change. I want to make God the number one priority in my life, and to work at getting to know him better.
  • Graduate.
  • Spend the summer in Alberta.
My friends and I have made so many plans already, and it's going to be impossible to squeeze them into a week or two or even a month. I'd like to be out there for most of the summer. For fun, but also because I want to figure out how I handle being on my own. I'll be staying with friends, but I'll get a job, and be working towards...something.

  • Write more. Lots more.
I want to write more on my blog, of course, but also story stuff. I have a few ideas, and I mean really, what else do I have to do? All those angsty famous authors wrote their stories in grey places where it was always foggy and they were completely isolated, right? Right.

  • Make some sort of plan for next year.
I'm graduating this spring, and that's as far as my plans go. After the summer, everything's completely blank. I'm thinking of applying to a hair college, but my big issue is, where? Calgary or Halifax? That's going to be a tough decision. 
  • Try and take up art again.
I used to be so into my sketching and painting, and about two years ago, I just stopped. I don't know why, but I need to start practicing that again.

  • Find some sort of activity here to get involved in.
Book club? Dance class? Volunteering? A job????? Something. It's been over four months, and I haven't made a single friend. I haven't done anything. And while I often indulge in the urge to sit alone in my room for hours and not interact with anyone ever, being lonely gets tiring.

  • Try to feel less homesick.
This is going to be the hardest. I miss home. I miss my house, I miss my neighborhood, I miss my town, I miss my friends and my church. Even writing about it makes my chest hurt and my eyes sting. That's where I belong, way way out on the other side of Canada. But I'm here now, and dwelling on the hurt doesn't really help anyone, does it?


Dec 31, 2013

THOUGHTS: new year, new fears.

2014 is just around the corner. For the first time in my memory, I'm not excited about the new year. I'm not sure why. In the years past, December 31st would come around, and I'd be thrilled, anticipating all the opportunities and experiences coming my way. A year is a long time, I've learned, and there's room for just about anything to happen. That used to excite me, but now, it scares me.

2013 was a pretty incredible year. I learned so many new things, and grew in so many ways. There were a lot of firsts for me, and a lot of done-this-a-thousand-times. I made memories I'll cherish for as long as I live. And I'm sad to be officially leaving that all behind. I've been here in Nova Scotia for over 3 months. Today, actually, is exactly 4 months since I left home. In some ways, it feels like it was only the other day that I hugged my friends goodbye and got into the van, trying not to cry. In other ways, it feels like years and years ago.

Either way, 2013 was probably one of the best years I remember having. There were some difficult times (hello, moving) but I definitely think the good outshone the bad a hundredfold. Now, it's just about to end, and a whole new year is coming. A whole new year of unsurety and apprehension, a new year where the page is completely blank and the bend in the road isn't a bend, it's an obnoxiously sharp turn. I have literally no idea what's in store for me. I've decided I'm not a huge fan of "new." This move has made me one of the most nostalgic people alive!

I do have some ideas, of course. I want to graduate (heeeeeee...), I want to spend my summer in Alberta and get a feel of what it would be like living on my own. And then I want to decide where I plan on spending the next few years. The thought of having to make a decision like that makes me cringe. I don't do decisions. I don't know if these things I want are going to happen. I don't have a job, I don't have the first clue how to get one where I'm living right now. Hopefully, by the time 2015 rolls in, I'll have myself a bit more straightened out.

So I guess, if I have to have a resolution, it's just one, and it's this; I resolve to take control of my life. By 2015, I want to have some sort of plan. So here's hoping!

Nov 22, 2013

THOUGHTS: made new.

"Behold, I make all things new." (Revelation 21:5)

So much hope in so few words.