Dear Shoes...

I love you. Thanks for being my friend.
I knew right from the beginning that we would hit it off. I looked at you on the shelf, saw the price, and fell for you immediately. I mean, who doesn't adore $100 shoes that cost $25? 
(Just so you know how special you are, I've never spent that much money on any pair of shoes before)

You're my favorite sneakers. But don't tell my airwalks. I don't want to hurt their feelings. They were my favorite for the longest time, remember? 
Also, thanks for staying so white.
I don't know how you do it. I've worn you to a ranch, in a canoe that was so full of rain it was like a tub. Actually, I was very impressed that my feet weren't soaked. 
(Okay, slight exaggeration)
Thanks for protecting them.
And to a farm on Saturday. Granted, I didn't really step in mud or anything, but usually, anything I own that is white never stays white for very long. 

You're so pretty. I love your shiny thread and the big DC. I feel so proud of myself for owning a pair or popular, expensive shoes even though I didn't pay too much for them. But that's our little secret. DON'T TELL ANYONE. Not even your little DC friends. OR even the shoes I leave you next to.

You must know, that I don't throw you randomly on my bedroon floor because I don't care. It's because I do I think less about you...yeah...
I throw you on the floor so I can find you the next day!

I'd wear you almost anywhere. Except maybe to have tea with the Queen. I'm sorry, but sneakers are too casual to meet with someone as important as she is. Even if I cleaned the meager amount of dirt off of you. Her Majesty might not appreciate that, and if I actually was invited to have tea with the Queen, I'd want to make a good impression.
If I had a magic want, I'd transform you into high-heels that were still as comfy as the sneaker-you. They's still have the awesome pink and silver design, but maybe I'd have to get rid of the DC. Words on high heels look funny.
I'm really sorry that I won't be able to wear you when I go to tea with the Queen.

Wait. Tea with the Queen? 
I don't remember being invited to have tea with the Queen. I'm not important. Or famous. Or talented.
(Although Miley Cyrus preformed for the Queen, and she's not talented...)
Or cool. Or pretty. Or anything of importance that would make her even become aware of my existence and invite me to have tea with her. I need to stop being a freak. I suppose I could do something drastic....
But then I'd just end up in jail. And I don't think Her Majesty visits prisons.
Although, I might get visited by the Pope?


God Bless,



  1. You're just too funny, Gwen!!!!!!

  2. THATS AWESOME!!!! haha... I love love love this post. :) And no, you're not a freak. You are pretty... and talented, and just LOVELY! As far as Miley Cyrus goes... you hit the nail on the head! haha. Great post... great shoes. Maybe you can let me borrow them sometime ;)



  3. Aw thanks Bleah!

    Um...I think I have significantly larger feet than you. I'm a size9-9 1/2.

    What are you?


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